It’s not uncommon for young adults to hit roadblocks after high school or college. Some move back home after graduation, others pause before starting careers. A little uncertainty is expected. But when months turn into years of stalled progress — no clear direction, no next step — it can leave families feeling frustrated, confused, and unsure of how to help.
It’s a pattern that’s often labeled as “failure to launch” — but behind that label is usually a mix of anxiety, self-doubt, and stalled momentum that deserves understanding, not judgment.
The term “failure to launch” can sound harsh, but at its core, it describes something real: a pattern where a capable young adult struggles to move forward in areas like work, school, or independent living. Often, they’re stuck in a cycle of avoidance, anxiety, and low motivation, which can be confusing and heartbreaking for parents to witness.
Let’s take a closer look at what failure to launch really means, why it happens, and how therapy can help.
What Is Failure to Launch?
"Failure to launch" refers to when a young adult has difficulty making the transition into independent adulthood. This might look like:
Living at home with no plans to move out
Not working or pursuing education
Avoiding responsibilities like budgeting, scheduling, or self-care
Relying heavily on parents for emotional or logistical support
Seeming unsure, unmotivated, or anxious about the future
It’s easy to misread these struggles as a lack of motivation, but for many young adults, the experience is far more complicated. They often feel stuck, overwhelmed, or ashamed — and unsure how to move forward, even when they want to.
Signs Your Young Adult May Be Struggling to Launch
Every person is different, but some common signs of a "failure to launch" pattern include:
Chronic avoidance of decision-making
Disengagement from peers, work, or academics
Difficulty maintaining routines or basic responsibilities
High sensitivity to stress or uncertainty
Frequent conflicts with parents about independence
Low motivation despite past achievement
Anxiety or hopelessness when talking about the future
These challenges don’t develop overnight, and they don’t mean your young adult lacks potential. In fact, many of the young people we work with in therapy are bright, thoughtful, and creative. They just need support in different areas to move forward.
Why Does This Happen?
There’s no single cause of failure to launch. Often, it’s a mix of factors:
Anxiety or depression that makes everyday tasks feel overwhelming
Perfectionism or fear of failure that prevents taking risks
Executive functioning difficulties, such as challenges with planning, follow-through, or organization
Low self-esteem or unclear sense of identity
Over-involvement or enmeshment in the parent-child relationship
Disrupted transitions, like medical conditions, dropping out of college or moving home unexpectedly
It’s also important to consider the larger context. The landscape of young adulthood has changed. Social pressures, an unpredictable job market, and growing mental health challenges have made this phase of life more complex than it once was. For many young people, navigating these changes feels overwhelming, and they’re doing the best they can with the tools they have.
How We Help Young Adults Get Unstuck
For young adults who feel stalled, overwhelmed, or unsure of where to start, having the right kind of support can make all the difference. At our practice, we offer a combination of therapy and career coaching — two approaches that work best when used together.
Career coaching helps young adults gain clarity around their goals — both short-term and long-term. It offers structure, accountability, and step-by-step support to move forward. Whether it’s applying to jobs, creating routines, or building confidence in decision-making, coaching gives momentum to the process of launching.
At the same time, therapy addresses the deeper layers that can keep someone stuck — things like anxiety, self-doubt, low self-worth, perfectionism, or fear of failure. In therapy, we focus on building insight and emotional regulation, while helping clients reconnect to a sense of agency and possibility.
We focus on creating a supportive, collaborative environment where young adults can move forward at a sustainable pace. With both practical tools and emotional insight, we help clients build momentum through clarity, consistency, and genuine encouragement.
We also work closely with parents when appropriate — offering guidance on how to support your adult child in ways that encourage growth without reinforcing dependence.
This Doesn’t Have to Be the End of the Story
If your young adult is struggling to launch, it doesn’t mean they’re broken — and it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent. What it often means is that something in the system needs support.
We’ve worked with many young adults who felt stuck for years and who found their way forward with the right combination of therapeutic insight, coaching support, and clear, compassionate boundaries at home.
Therapy for Young Adults in Westport, CT and Across Connecticut
At Gofman Therapy & Consulting, we specialize in helping young adults and their families move through this difficult period of transition.
Our Therapy and Career Coaching services are available for young adults in Westport, CT, and virtually across Connecticut and Virginia. Whether your child is living at home, navigating post-college limbo, or simply feeling lost — we’re here to help.
FAQ
What are the signs of failure to launch in young adults?
Failure to launch isn’t a formal diagnosis, but it often describes a pattern where a young adult is struggling to move forward with typical milestones of independence. Some common signs include living at home without a plan, avoiding work or school, lacking motivation, or feeling overwhelmed by decisions. It can also show up as anxiety, low self-confidence, or executive functioning challenges that make daily responsibilities feel unmanageable.
What kind of therapy helps with failure to launch?
Therapy that addresses failure to launch often combines emotional insight with practical skill-building. At Gofman Therapy & Consulting, we support young adults through a mix of talk therapy, executive functioning support, and (when appropriate) career coaching. Therapy can help uncover what’s keeping someone stuck — like anxiety, perfectionism, or self-doubt — and coaching provides structure and accountability to move forward.
Is it normal for adult children to still live at home?
Yes — especially in today’s world. Economic shifts, student debt, and mental health challenges have made the transition into independent adulthood more complex. Living at home doesn’t automatically mean something is wrong. But if your adult child feels stuck, avoidant, or distressed — and it’s creating tension at home — it may be time to explore extra support.
Can anxiety cause failure to launch?
Absolutely. Anxiety is one of the most common root causes we see in young adults who feel paralyzed by next steps. It can show up as indecision, avoidance, perfectionism, or intense fear of failure. Therapy can help clients build coping tools, reduce avoidance patterns, and begin to take action even when discomfort is present.
Do you offer therapy for young adults in Connecticut and Virginia?
Yes. We offer in-person sessions at our Westport, CT office and virtual therapy across Connecticut and Virginia. We specialize in working with young adults who feel stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure how to move forward — including those navigating failure to launch patterns, anxiety, or career indecision.
If you're looking for support, we’d be glad to talk about whether our approach might be the right fit.