Stress

Chronic Stress & the Nervous System: How Therapy Can Help

When stress becomes the default setting, it’s hard to notice how much it’s costing you.

Most people can handle short bursts of stress. It’s part of being human. But when that stress becomes constant — woven into daily life without a clear off-ramp — it can start to take a real toll, both physically and emotionally.

Chronic stress doesn’t always look dramatic. In fact, many of the clients we work with are thoughtful, high-achieving individuals who are used to managing a lot. On the outside, they may appear calm, competent, and in control — but inside, they feel tense, overwhelmed, and depleted. Social pressure to keep it together often adds another layer, making it harder to recognize or address what’s actually going on.

The effects of chronic stress tend to build slowly. It might show up as disrupted sleep, persistent tension, irritability, brain fog, or the sense of never quite coming off high alert. Over time, the nervous system adapts to this constant demand by shifting into survival mode. The longer it stays there, the harder it becomes to return to a baseline of calm.

This article explores how chronic stress impacts the brain and body, and how therapy can help interrupt the cycle, support nervous system regulation, and create space for sustainable healing.

Support for Chronic Stress Starts Here

What Happens When Stress Becomes Chronic

Stress activates the body’s fight-flight-freeze response, a built-in survival system designed to protect us from danger. In short bursts, this response is useful: It sharpens focus, increases energy, and helps us respond to immediate challenges. But the nervous system isn’t designed to live in this state indefinitely. When stress is constant, the “off switch” becomes harder to access.

Chronic stress often develops in response to ongoing demands that feel hard to escape or control. For many teens and young adults, this might stem from academic pressure, social stress, or the weight of high expectations. Young professionals may experience it through unstable work environments, financial uncertainty, or difficulty balancing independence with responsibility. And for individuals living with chronic pain, the constant management of symptoms and daily functioning can place the nervous system in a prolonged state of strain. Over time, stress like this can shift the body’s baseline — making rest, clarity, and emotional flexibility harder to access.

People experiencing chronic stress often describe:

  • Trouble sleeping, even when exhausted

  • Increased irritability or emotional numbness

  • Physical symptoms with no clear medical cause

  • Constant muscle tension or digestive issues

  • Difficulty focusing or making decisions

  • Feeling disconnected from self or others

It’s important to recognize that these aren’t isolated symptoms. They’re part of a larger pattern rooted in nervous system dysregulation, a state where the body struggles to return to a sense of safety or calm.

What Chronic Stress Does to the Nervous System

When the nervous system is under constant demand, it often shifts into sympathetic dominance. This means the body stays in a state of readiness: heart rate elevated, muscles tense, stress hormones like cortisol remaining high. At the same time, the parasympathetic system — responsible for rest and recovery — becomes harder to access.

This can lead to:

  • A persistent feeling of urgency or vigilance

  • Emotional overwhelm, or difficulty feeling emotions at all

  • Physical fatigue with no sense of real rest

  • Delayed recovery from even small stressors

Over time, these physiological patterns can change the way the brain interprets and responds to experiences. The amygdala, which processes threat, may become more reactive. The prefrontal cortex, which supports executive function and regulation, may struggle to stay engaged.

These shifts are not signs of weakness or failure. They’re the nervous system adapting to ongoing conditions — and they are reversible, especially with the right support.

What Makes Chronic Stress Different From General Anxiety or Burnout?

Although these experiences often overlap, chronic stress is not the same as generalized anxiety or burnout.

  • Anxiety can occur in the absence of external stressors. It’s often characterized by intrusive worry and future-oriented fear.

  • Burnout is typically related to occupational stress and emotional exhaustion related to roles and responsibilities.

  • Chronic stress describes the body’s sustained physiological and psychological response to persistent external demand. It often includes features of both anxiety and burnout but is rooted in prolonged activation of the stress response system itself.

This distinction matters because treatment and support need to match the nature of the problem. In therapy, understanding whether a client is experiencing chronic stress — versus burnout or generalized anxiety — helps guide the work in a more targeted way.

Start with a Free 15-Minute Consultation

How Therapy Can Help With Chronic Stress

Therapy provides a structured, collaborative space to understand your stress patterns, regulate your nervous system, and rebuild a sense of internal safety. For many clients, the shift doesn’t happen through “relaxation” alone. It comes from learning new ways of relating to the body’s signals and stress responses over time.

Effective therapy for chronic stress often includes:

Nervous System Regulation

We introduce grounding practices, breathwork, and body-based strategies that support the parasympathetic nervous system. These tools are practical and repeatable, helping clients return to a calmer baseline.

Emotional Processing

Chronic stress often leads to suppressed or dysregulated emotion. Therapy offers a place to name what’s been held in or pushed aside — safely and at your own pace.

Thought Pattern Awareness

Cognitive work helps clients understand how beliefs and internal narratives reinforce the stress response. This includes patterns like perfectionism, guilt, or constant self-monitoring.

Behavior and Boundaries

Together, we explore where energy is being spent — and whether that aligns with values or survival patterns. Setting boundaries or reevaluating commitments becomes a key part of re-regulation.

Identity and Agency

Long-term stress can lead to disconnection from values, motivation, or sense of self. Therapy can help reconnect with purpose and clarify what matters beyond coping.

Causes of Chronic Stress We Commonly See

Every client brings their own experiences and context to therapy, but among the teens, young adults, and professionals we work with, chronic stress often stems from:

  • Ongoing academic pressure or fear of falling behind

  • Career uncertainty, job instability, or workplace burnout

  • Identity-related stress (including race, gender, and sexuality)

  • The impact of chronic pain or complex health conditions

  • High family expectations or tension around independence

  • A history of trauma or emotional disconnection

  • The mental load of “keeping it together” without visible support

Stress doesn’t only come from obvious crises. The nervous system responds just as strongly to emotional overload, social pressure, and situations where a person feels stuck but still expected to function.

Therapy for Chronic Stress in Westport, CT and Beyond

At Gofman Therapy & Consulting, we support adults, teens, and young professionals experiencing the mental, emotional, and physical effects of chronic stress. We offer therapy that’s grounded in:

  • Nervous system science and regulation

  • Trauma-informed frameworks

  • Cognitive and somatic integration

  • Realistic tools for daily life

  • Collaborative, client-centered care

We see clients in person at our Westport, CT office, and virtually across Connecticut and Virginia.

If you’re finding it hard to rest, think clearly, or feel like yourself — that may be a sign your system is carrying more than it can manage alone. Therapy can help.

Schedule a Free Consultation

If stress has become the background noise of your life, it may be time for support that goes deeper than just coping skills.

We’re here to help you reconnect to a sense of calm, clarity, and possibility — one step at a time.

Take the first step today

FAQ: Therapy for Chronic Stress and Nervous System Regulation

What are the effects of chronic stress?

Chronic stress can affect nearly every system in the body. It often shows up as fatigue, sleep problems, digestive issues, tension, brain fog, irritability, and difficulty regulating emotion. Over time, it may increase the risk of anxiety, depression, and physical health issues.

How does therapy help with chronic stress?

Therapy helps by addressing both the physiological and psychological patterns that keep stress going. We use tools for nervous system regulation, emotional processing, and cognitive restructuring to create meaningful, lasting change.

Can chronic stress affect memory or concentration?

Yes. Chronic stress affects areas of the brain related to focus, memory, and decision-making. Clients often report feeling foggy or distracted, even when they’re trying to stay on task.

Do you offer virtual therapy for stress and burnout?

Yes. We offer in person therapy in Westport, CT and virtual therapy to clients across Connecticut and Virginia. Whether you’re looking for help with chronic stress, high-functioning anxiety, or burnout, we can support you from wherever you are.

What Is Failure to Launch? Signs Your Young Adult May Be Struggling to Thrive

It’s not uncommon for young adults to hit roadblocks after high school or college. Some move back home after graduation, others pause before starting careers. A little uncertainty is expected. But when months turn into years of stalled progress — no clear direction, no next step — it can leave families feeling frustrated, confused, and unsure of how to help.

It’s a pattern that’s often labeled as “failure to launch” — but behind that label is usually a mix of anxiety, self-doubt, and stalled momentum that deserves understanding, not judgment.

The term “failure to launch” can sound harsh, but at its core, it describes something real: a pattern where a capable young adult struggles to move forward in areas like work, school, or independent living. Often, they’re stuck in a cycle of avoidance, anxiety, and low motivation, which can be confusing and heartbreaking for parents to witness.

Let’s take a closer look at what failure to launch really means, why it happens, and how therapy can help.

What Is Failure to Launch?

"Failure to launch" refers to when a young adult has difficulty making the transition into independent adulthood. This might look like:

  • Living at home with no plans to move out

  • Not working or pursuing education

  • Avoiding responsibilities like budgeting, scheduling, or self-care

  • Relying heavily on parents for emotional or logistical support

  • Seeming unsure, unmotivated, or anxious about the future

It’s easy to misread these struggles as a lack of motivation, but for many young adults, the experience is far more complicated. They often feel stuck, overwhelmed, or ashamed — and unsure how to move forward, even when they want to.

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Signs Your Young Adult May Be Struggling to Launch

Every person is different, but some common signs of a "failure to launch" pattern include:

  • Chronic avoidance of decision-making

  • Disengagement from peers, work, or academics

  • Difficulty maintaining routines or basic responsibilities

  • High sensitivity to stress or uncertainty

  • Frequent conflicts with parents about independence

  • Low motivation despite past achievement

  • Anxiety or hopelessness when talking about the future

These challenges don’t develop overnight, and they don’t mean your young adult lacks potential. In fact, many of the young people we work with in therapy are bright, thoughtful, and creative. They just need support in different areas to move forward.

Why Does This Happen?

There’s no single cause of failure to launch. Often, it’s a mix of factors:

  • Anxiety or depression that makes everyday tasks feel overwhelming

  • Perfectionism or fear of failure that prevents taking risks

  • Executive functioning difficulties, such as challenges with planning, follow-through, or organization

  • Low self-esteem or unclear sense of identity

  • Over-involvement or enmeshment in the parent-child relationship

  • Disrupted transitions, like medical conditions, dropping out of college or moving home unexpectedly

It’s also important to consider the larger context. The landscape of young adulthood has changed. Social pressures, an unpredictable job market, and growing mental health challenges have made this phase of life more complex than it once was. For many young people, navigating these changes feels overwhelming, and they’re doing the best they can with the tools they have.

How We Help Young Adults Get Unstuck

For young adults who feel stalled, overwhelmed, or unsure of where to start, having the right kind of support can make all the difference. At our practice, we offer a combination of therapy and career coaching — two approaches that work best when used together.

Career coaching helps young adults gain clarity around their goals — both short-term and long-term. It offers structure, accountability, and step-by-step support to move forward. Whether it’s applying to jobs, creating routines, or building confidence in decision-making, coaching gives momentum to the process of launching.

At the same time, therapy addresses the deeper layers that can keep someone stuck — things like anxiety, self-doubt, low self-worth, perfectionism, or fear of failure. In therapy, we focus on building insight and emotional regulation, while helping clients reconnect to a sense of agency and possibility.

We focus on creating a supportive, collaborative environment where young adults can move forward at a sustainable pace. With both practical tools and emotional insight, we help clients build momentum through clarity, consistency, and genuine encouragement.

We also work closely with parents when appropriate — offering guidance on how to support your adult child in ways that encourage growth without reinforcing dependence.

Ready to Take the First Step?

This Doesn’t Have to Be the End of the Story

If your young adult is struggling to launch, it doesn’t mean they’re broken — and it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent. What it often means is that something in the system needs support.

We’ve worked with many young adults who felt stuck for years and who found their way forward with the right combination of therapeutic insight, coaching support, and clear, compassionate boundaries at home.

Therapy for Young Adults in Westport, CT and Across Connecticut

At Gofman Therapy & Consulting, we specialize in helping young adults and their families move through this difficult period of transition.

Our Therapy and Career Coaching services are available for young adults in Westport, CT, and virtually across Connecticut and Virginia. Whether your child is living at home, navigating post-college limbo, or simply feeling lost — we’re here to help.


Let’s Talk About What’s Going On

FAQ

What are the signs of failure to launch in young adults?

Failure to launch isn’t a formal diagnosis, but it often describes a pattern where a young adult is struggling to move forward with typical milestones of independence. Some common signs include living at home without a plan, avoiding work or school, lacking motivation, or feeling overwhelmed by decisions. It can also show up as anxiety, low self-confidence, or executive functioning challenges that make daily responsibilities feel unmanageable.

What kind of therapy helps with failure to launch?

Therapy that addresses failure to launch often combines emotional insight with practical skill-building. At Gofman Therapy & Consulting, we support young adults through a mix of talk therapy, executive functioning support, and (when appropriate) career coaching. Therapy can help uncover what’s keeping someone stuck — like anxiety, perfectionism, or self-doubt — and coaching provides structure and accountability to move forward.

Is it normal for adult children to still live at home?

Yes — especially in today’s world. Economic shifts, student debt, and mental health challenges have made the transition into independent adulthood more complex. Living at home doesn’t automatically mean something is wrong. But if your adult child feels stuck, avoidant, or distressed — and it’s creating tension at home — it may be time to explore extra support.

Can anxiety cause failure to launch?

Absolutely. Anxiety is one of the most common root causes we see in young adults who feel paralyzed by next steps. It can show up as indecision, avoidance, perfectionism, or intense fear of failure. Therapy can help clients build coping tools, reduce avoidance patterns, and begin to take action even when discomfort is present.

Do you offer therapy for young adults in Connecticut and Virginia?

Yes. We offer in-person sessions at our Westport, CT office and virtual therapy across Connecticut and Virginia. We specialize in working with young adults who feel stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure how to move forward — including those navigating failure to launch patterns, anxiety, or career indecision.

If you're looking for support, we’d be glad to talk about whether our approach might be the right fit.

Schedule a 15-minute phone consultation today

How to Manage Test Anxiety: Therapist-Recommended Strategies For Teens and Young Adults

If your stomach drops every time you walk into an exam room, or if you freeze up before a big test despite being fully prepared, you're not alone.

Test anxiety is real, and it’s more than just “nerves.” For many teens and young adults, it can become a distressing, recurring pattern that affects academic performance, mental health, and self-esteem. And while it's common, it's also manageable — especially when you understand what’s happening underneath and how to approach it with the right tools.

As therapists who specialize in anxiety therapy for teens and young adults in Westport, CT and beyond, we work with students all the time who are high-achieving, motivated, and still feel paralyzed by the pressure of performance.

Let’s walk through what test anxiety really is, why it happens, and how therapy can help.

Get Support for Test Anxiety Today

What Is Test Anxiety?

Test anxiety is a form of performance anxiety. It happens when the stress of a testing situation triggers a fight-flight-freeze response — even when the person is academically capable and well-prepared.

Common signs include:

  • Racing heart, shortness of breath, nausea

  • Negative self-talk or catastrophic thinking (“I’m going to fail,” “Everyone will know I’m not smart”)

  • Blank mind or difficulty concentrating during the exam

  • Avoidance of studying or over-preparing to an extreme

  • Trouble sleeping or feeling on edge before a test

For some, these symptoms start days or weeks before the exam. For others, they hit suddenly the moment they sit down to begin.

Why Does Test Anxiety Happen?

Test anxiety isn’t about laziness or lack of preparation — and it's not something you can just “get over.” It’s often connected to a deeper fear:

What does it say about me if I fail?

That fear might come from:

  • Perfectionism or high expectations

  • Fear of disappointing others (parents, teachers, coaches)

  • Previous negative experiences with testing or school performance

  • Generalized anxiety that spikes under pressure

  • Undiagnosed OCD or learning differences

  • Low tolerance for uncertainty or mistakes

In therapy, we often explore not just the surface anxiety but also the underlying thought patterns, beliefs about success, and habits that reinforce the anxiety loop.

Ready to get started? Book your free consultation today

5 Therapist-Backed Strategies for Managing Test Anxiety

Here’s what we focus on with students in therapy — both in-person at our Westport, CT office and virtually across Connecticut and Virginia.

1. Shift from Outcome to Process

Most test anxiety is future-focused: What if I fail? What if I freeze up?

We work with clients to reorient their attention to the process:

  • What is within your control?

  • What is enough preparation?

  • What does it mean to do your best — even if it’s not perfect?

2. Practice Exposure to the Anxiety — Not Avoidance

Avoiding the thought (“I’ll fail”) might feel better in the moment, but it gives anxiety more power. In therapy, we may use exposure-based strategies to face the uncomfortable thoughts and feelings without “fixing” them. By building resilience over time, you ultimately learning that the situation is not actually dangerous, and that the uncomfortable sensations are tolerable.

This is especially helpful for students who:

  • Constantly seek reassurance

  • Rely on rituals before every test

  • Feel unable to tolerate even the idea of failure

3. Challenge Unhelpful Thought Loops

Cognitive distortions like:

  • “If I don’t ace this test, I’m a failure”

  • “One bad grade will ruin everything”

    — are common in test anxiety.

We use CBT techniques to help clients notice, name, and reframe these patterns — so the pressure doesn’t spiral into panic.

4. Support the Nervous System

We don’t just work on changing thoughts — we also help clients build a different relationship with the sensations of anxiety in their bodies.

When test anxiety kicks in, the nervous system often reacts like there's a real threat: fast heart rate, shortness of breath, tense muscles. These responses aren’t dangerous — but they feel urgent. Over time, your brain can start associating tests or performance situations with that sense of danger, even if you're safe.

Through therapy, we use regulation strategies like breathing techniques, grounding, movement, and intentional exposure to anxiety triggers. These techniques aren’t just relaxation strategies; they help the nervous system relearn what's actually threatening and what's not.

Because of neuroplasticity — the brain’s ability to rewire itself — we know that the more you practice responding to anxiety differently, the more your system can shift. It’s not just about tolerating stress, it’s about gradually changing the way your body and brain respond to pressure, so it doesn’t feel as overwhelming in the first place.

5. Reframe What “Success” Looks Like

A key part of test anxiety recovery is building flexibility around the idea of achievement. For some students, the pressure to “never mess up” becomes so intense that it blocks learning, creativity, and confidence. Therapy helps create space to redefine success in a way that includes effort, growth, and self-worth — not just grades.

Explore Therapy for Teens & Young Adult

What If I’ve Tried Coping Tools and They Haven’t Worked?

That’s a common experience — especially if the anxiety is part of a larger pattern of perfectionism, social anxiety, or even undiagnosed OCD (which can sometimes show up as performance-related fear).

If you’ve tried breathing exercises, time management tips, or study hacks — and you're still overwhelmed — working with a trained therapist can help you get a more accurate understanding of what is going on, and identify the best strategies to help you experience real change.

Therapy for Test Anxiety in Connecticut and Virginia

At Gofman Therapy & Consulting, we specialize in working with:

  • High school students, college students, and young adults

  • Parents supporting anxious teens

  • Clients who feel “stuck” in overthinking and performance pressure

We offer in-person sessions at our Westport, CT office, and virtual therapy across Connecticut and Virginia.

You don’t have to push through it alone — and it doesn’t have to stay this hard. Let’s talk about what you’re experiencing and see if therapy might be a good fit.


Schedule a free phone consultation today

FAQ

What is test anxiety, and how do I know if I have it?

Test anxiety is more than feeling nervous before an exam. It can cause physical symptoms (like nausea or rapid heartbeat), mental blocks (like forgetting everything you studied), and emotional distress. If you find yourself freezing up during tests, constantly over-preparing, or dreading school even when you know you’re capable, you may be experiencing test anxiety.

Can therapy actually help with test anxiety?

Yes. Therapy can help you understand where your anxiety is coming from, challenge unhelpful thinking patterns, and develop new ways to relate to stress. At our practice, we use evidence-based approaches like CBT and exposure work to help clients change the way their brain and body respond to pressure.

Is test anxiety the same as regular anxiety?

Test anxiety is a form of performance anxiety — a specific type of anxiety triggered by evaluation or high-pressure situations. While it shares features with general anxiety (like worry or overthinking), it often involves perfectionism, fear of failure, and physical panic symptoms that show up around academic tasks.

What if study tips and breathing exercises haven’t worked for me?

That’s very common. Many students try coping strategies that only work temporarily or don’t address the root of the anxiety. Therapy can help go deeper — exploring the thought patterns, nervous system responses, and beliefs that keep the anxiety cycle going.

Do you offer therapy for test anxiety in Connecticut or online?

Yes. We work with teens and young adults in-person at our Westport, CT office, and offer virtual therapy throughout Connecticut and Virginia. Whether you're navigating high school, college, or grad school, we’re here to help.

What Is the Meaning of Life? Finding Purpose as a Teen or Young Adult

At some point, almost everyone asks the question: “What is the meaning of life?”

If you’ve ever wrestled with this, you’re not alone. It’s one of the most fundamental human questions—and one that can feel overwhelming. Philosopher Albert Camus once wrote, “To decide whether life is worth living is to answer the fundamental question of philosophy.”

But answering this question isn’t just an abstract thought experiment. Research shows that a strong sense of meaning and purpose is linked to real, measurable benefits for your well-being. People who feel their life has meaning are more likely to:

  • Build deeper friendships and stronger social connections

  • Engage in cultural and community activities

  • Have lower risks of depression and chronic disease

  • Maintain healthier lifestyles and physical activity

  • Experience lower rates of divorce and loneliness

In other words: feeling connected to meaning isn’t just “nice to have”—it’s an essential part of thriving.

But despite being so important, answering the question of the meaning of life can be really hard. Let’s explore how people have answered this question throughout history, why it feels more complicated today, and practical ways you can start building meaning and purpose in your own life.

A Brief History of Meaning—and the Modern Crisis of Purpose

Throughout history, humans have largely turned to religion to answer life's biggest questions. Religious traditions provided clear frameworks for understanding our purpose, offering explanations for why we're here and how we should live. These belief systems gave people a sense of cosmic significance and clear moral guidelines.

But in our modern world, traditional religious explanations have become less compelling for many. The rise of scientific understanding, global connectivity, and secular worldviews has challenged these age-old answers. This has left many people searching for new sources of meaning in their lives.

What has emerged in place of religious frameworks is complex and often contradictory. Our increasingly global perspective can make individual lives feel insignificant against the vast scale of human existence. We see ourselves as tiny dots in an enormous universe, which can make it harder to feel that our lives have inherent meaning.

Additionally, the rise of individualism in modern society has created a double-edged sword. While it has given us unprecedented freedom to choose our own path and create our own meaning, it has also placed an enormous burden on individuals to figure out what matters for themselves. Without shared cultural narratives to guide us, many people feel lost in their search for purpose.

Why You Might Struggle to Find Meaning

If you’ve been searching for meaning and coming up empty, you’re not broken—you’re human. In fact, many teens, young adults, and young professionals today feel the same way. The world has changed in ways that make it harder to feel grounded in purpose. Traditional sources of meaning don’t always resonate, and the pressure to “figure it out” on your own can feel overwhelming. Here are some of the most common reasons why people struggle:

  • Religious explanations may feel unconvincing: For some, faith once offered clear answers, but in light of modern perspectives, those explanations may feel less satisfying or harder to believe.

  • Following the “right” path hasn’t worked: You might have done everything you were “supposed” to do—get good grades, land the right job, get married, earn approval from others—but still feel empty.

  • Looking for answers externally doesn’t work: Waiting for someone else to give you meaning—whether it’s family, friends, or society—rarely leads to fulfillment. Purpose is not handed down; it’s something you create for yourself.

How to Start Creating Meaning in Your Life

The good news is that meaning isn’t something you either “have” or “don’t have.” It’s not a hidden treasure you need to stumble upon—it’s something you create through action and intention. Building a meaningful life starts with small shifts in how you see the world and how you choose to engage with it. If you’re feeling lost, these steps can help you begin moving toward a greater sense of purpose:

  • Reflect on the preciousness of life: Recognize that life is finite, and because of that, your choices matter. This awareness can make even ordinary moments feel significant.

  • Remember that humans are meaning-making creatures: Our minds are wired to seek patterns, stories, and connections. Instead of resisting that tendency, lean into it—find the stories that inspire you.

  • Zoom back in: It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the vastness of the universe. Instead, focus on what’s close at hand—the people you love, the experiences you’re having, the opportunities right in front of you.

  • Engage in the world: Meaning grows when we participate, not just when we consume. Volunteer, create something new, or connect with others in real ways. These actions bring purpose to life.

Activities That Can Provide Life Purpose

While the search for meaning can feel abstract, it often becomes clearer through the things we do. Psychiatrist Irvin Yalom identified several common pathways people use to cultivate purpose in their lives. These aren’t one-size-fits-all—what feels meaningful for one person may not for another—but exploring them can help you discover what resonates most with you. Here are some of the activities that often give people a sense of purpose:

  • Altruism: Helping others—whether through small acts of kindness, volunteering, or mentoring—can create a strong sense of connection and meaning. When you give to others, you often feel more grounded in your own life.

  • Dedication to a cause: Fighting for something bigger than yourself, like social justice, climate change, or community development, can give you a powerful sense of direction and significance.

  • Creativity: Expressing yourself through art, music, writing, or even problem-solving is one way to bring new ideas and beauty into the world. Creativity allows you to leave a unique mark that reflects who you are.

  • Hedonistic enjoyment (done mindfully): Finding joy in life’s pleasures—like food, nature, music, or friendship—can remind you that meaning is also found in living fully in the present.

  • Self-actualization: Developing your skills, pursuing your interests, and growing into your full potential can feel deeply purposeful. This path focuses on becoming the best version of yourself.

  • Self-transcendence: Connecting with something larger than yourself—whether through spirituality, community, or the natural world—helps you see your life as part of a greater whole.

Exploring these different pathways can help you notice where you naturally feel most alive and fulfilled. You don’t need to pick just one; many people create meaning through a combination of these practices.

Final Thoughts: Meaning Is Created, Not Found

In the end, the search for the meaning of life isn’t about uncovering a hidden secret. It’s about building a life that feels meaningful to you. Meaning is created by what you choose to do, the relationships you cultivate, and the ways you engage with the world.

If you’re struggling to connect with a sense of purpose, you don’t have to navigate it alone.

At Gofman Therapy and Consulting, we help teens, young adults, and young professionals explore meaning, navigate challenges, and build fulfilling lives. Serving clients in-person in Fairfield, CT and throughout Virginia and Connecticut, our team of experienced therapists can support you in your journey.

Contact us today to schedule your free phone consultation

Acute vs Chronic Stress: How to Recognize the Difference and Protect Your Mental Health

Forest with light streaming through the trees

Introduction

In an earlier post, we discussed the basics of stress. We covered how stress is a deeply hard-wired response that has evolved over time to keep humans safe, the ways a person’s experience of an emotional threat feels similar to a situation where they are experiencing a physical threat, and we discussed the long-term effects to mental and physical health that can come from chronic stress.

Now we are going to zoom in on the difference between chronic stress and acute stress. We’ll cover basic definitions of acute and chronic stress, key differences between them, how to recognize stress in your own life, and how to cope with both acute and chronic stress.

What Is Acute Stress?

Acute stress is your body’s immediate response to a specific, short-term challenge. It’s the kind of stress you might feel when you're running late for a meeting, preparing for a job interview, or speaking in front of a crowd. In these moments, your body kicks into high gear to help you handle the pressure.

This response—often called the “fight or flight” reaction—involves a surge of stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. Your heart rate increases, your senses sharpen, and you become more alert and focused. These changes are your body’s natural way of helping you navigate short bursts of tension or danger.

Did you know that acute stress, when experienced in moderation, can actually help enhance performance? Research has shown that students who experienced moderate stress performed better on exams than students who had either low stress or high stress. Acute stress can push you to perform better under pressure, meet deadlines, or stay sharp during high-stakes moments. The key is that it resolves quickly once the stressor is gone, allowing your body to return to baseline without lingering effects.

What Is Chronic Stress?

Chronic stress is the kind of stress that doesn’t go away. It lingers over time—days, weeks, even months—and often stems from ongoing challenges that don’t have a clear end in sight. Unlike acute stress, which comes and goes quickly, chronic stress slowly wears you down and can take a serious toll on your physical and mental health.

Common sources of chronic stress include persistent job dissatisfaction, caregiving responsibilities, financial uncertainty, or living in an environment that feels unsafe or unstable. Because these stressors are continuous, your body stays in a prolonged state of alert, which is not what it was designed for.

Over time, chronic stress can lead to a wide range of health issues, including anxiety, burnout, trouble sleeping, and digestive problems. It’s also been linked to more serious conditions like high blood pressure, heart disease, and a weakened immune system. According to the American Psychological Association’s Stress in America survey, nearly one-third of adults report feeling so stressed that they struggle to function on a daily basis.

What makes chronic stress especially harmful is how invisible and normalized it can become. Many people live with it for so long that it begins to feel like their “normal.” But left unaddressed, chronic stress can chip away at your well-being, relationships, and sense of joy.

How Acute Stress Becomes Chronic

While acute stress is usually short-lived and manageable, it can quietly shift into chronic stress when the pressure doesn’t let up—or when stressful events keep piling on without time to recover. What starts as an occasional rush of tension can evolve into a constant undercurrent of stress that your body and mind carry around every day.

For example, a tough week at work with tight deadlines, or a week at school with several huge exams might create acute stress. But if that pace becomes your normal, and you continue to be over-scheduled and unsupported, the stress response may stop shutting off. Over time, your body stays in a heightened state of alert, even when you're not actively facing a specific challenge. That’s when stress shifts from being helpful to harmful.

It’s also common for acute stressors—like a one-time crisis, sudden illness, or major life transition—to leave lingering emotional effects. If those feelings aren’t processed or resolved, they can create a baseline of chronic stress that’s harder to identify because it becomes part of your routine.

The good news? Recognizing this shift is the first step toward interrupting the cycle. It’s crucial to understand that stress responses are not conscious choices. A person doesn’t “choose” to be stressed about something; it happens at the level of their nervous system. With the right support and strategies, it’s absolutely possible to help your nervous system learn to regulate itself again, and to re-train your stress response to “turn off” when it’s appropriate.

Acute vs Chronic Stress: Key Differences

To better understand how acute and chronic stress differ—not just in duration, but in how they affect your body, mind, and daily life—it can help to see the two side by side. Below is a quick comparison of key features that set them apart and what each might look like in real life.

A table showing the difference between acute and chronic stress. Categorized by duration, triggers, symptoms, impact, resolution, mental effects, health risks, and examples

How to Recognize Stress in Your Own Life

Stress doesn’t always announce itself loudly. Sometimes, it shows up in subtle ways—through irritability, exhaustion, or feeling “off” without knowing why. Learning to recognize the signs of both acute and chronic stress is essential for catching it early and responding with care instead of burnout.

Common signs of stress can include:

  • Mental: Racing thoughts, trouble concentrating, memory lapses

  • Emotional: Anxiety, mood swings, irritability, feeling overwhelmed

  • Physical: Headaches, muscle tension, stomach issues, sleep disruption

  • Behavioral: Withdrawing from others, changes in appetite, procrastination

If you’re not sure how stress is affecting you, try asking yourself:

  • Do I feel constantly on edge, even when nothing “big” is happening?

  • Have I stopped enjoying things that used to make me happy?

  • Do I bounce back easily from tough days, or does the stress linger?

  • Am I more tired than usual, even when I sleep?

Reflecting on questions like these can reveal patterns that often go unnoticed in the rush of daily life.

To help you track your own stress, you can download our free Stress Journal Template —a simple, guided tool to check in with your thoughts, emotions, and triggers over time. It’s a great first step in building awareness and regaining control.

Coping Strategies for Each Type of Stress

While acute and chronic stress may feel similar, they require different approaches to manage. The good news is that both types of stress can be handled effectively with the right strategies. Let’s break down what works best for each.

Acute Stress Relief

When you’re dealing with a stressful situation that’s temporary—like a deadline, a tough conversation, or a public speaking event—relieving stress in the moment is key. Acute stress is often intense but brief, so the goal is to bring your body and mind back to a calm state quickly.

Here are some effective techniques to relieve acute stress:

  • Deep Breathing: Deep breathing exercises (like diaphragmatic breathing) activate your body’s relaxation response. Just a minute or two can help you regain focus and calm.

  • Grounding Techniques: Focus on the present moment. Use your senses to reconnect with your environment—try the 5-4-3-2-1 method (name 5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell, 1 you can taste).

  • Time Management: If a tight schedule is causing stress, break tasks down into smaller chunks and prioritize. This can help reduce the overwhelm and allow you to feel more in control.

  • Create a Focused Environment: Minimize distractions to help center your attention on the task at hand. Whether it's clearing your workspace, putting your phone on silent, or using noise-canceling headphones, setting up an environment that supports focus can reduce the overwhelm and help you tackle what’s most important.

These quick strategies can help you regain composure when stress hits unexpectedly, allowing you to continue with your day or task more effectively.

Chronic Stress Management

Chronic stress, on the other hand, requires ongoing effort and lifestyle changes to manage. Since it’s a long-term, persistent issue, it’s important to build habits that promote resilience and well-being over time. The key here is not just “fixing” stress in the moment, but addressing the root causes and setting yourself up for long-term success.

Here are some strategies for managing chronic stress:

  • Setting Boundaries: It’s essential to establish clear boundaries in your personal and professional life. This might mean saying no to extra tasks, limiting time with energy-draining people, or setting time aside for yourself regularly.

  • Regular Exercise: Physical activity is one of the most effective ways to combat chronic stress. Whether it’s going for a walk, yoga, or strength training, moving your body helps reduce stress hormones and releases endorphins, improving mood and energy levels.

  • Therapy & Counseling: Seeking professional help is a powerful tool for managing chronic stress. Therapy offers support, coping strategies, and guidance, especially when dealing with deep-rooted or ongoing stressors. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can be particularly helpful for learning how to change unhealthy stress patterns.

  • Mindfulness & Meditation: Incorporating mindfulness practices like meditation, yoga, or simply taking quiet moments to focus on your breath can help you remain centered and reduce stress over time. Mindfulness trains your brain to stay present, preventing the cycle of rumination that often fuels chronic stress.

  • Building Long-Term Habits: Unlike acute stress, chronic stress isn’t something you can solve overnight. The key is developing regular habits that promote balance and mental clarity. Practicing these strategies consistently will help you build resilience to stress and improve overall well-being.

The key to managing chronic stress is consistency. While it may take time to see significant changes, these habits can help you regain control of your stress levels and create a more balanced, fulfilling life.

When to Seek Help

Stress can be a manageable part of life, but there are times when it becomes overwhelming and starts to interfere with your daily functioning. If you’re finding it difficult to keep up with responsibilities, or if stress is affecting your mental or physical health—such as persistent anxiety, trouble sleeping, headaches, or digestive problems—it’s a good sign that professional help may be needed.

It’s also important to understand that you don’t have to wait for a crisis to seek therapy. Stress doesn’t always come in a dramatic form; it can build over time, and therapy can provide valuable tools to manage it before it escalates. Just like you’d see a doctor for a physical concern, seeking mental health support for stress is a proactive way to take care of yourself.

Chronic stress can also impact areas of life beyond your mental health. It can strain relationships, make it difficult to focus at work, and interfere with sleep, creating a cycle that’s hard to break. If stress is negatively affecting your ability to enjoy life, seeking help can help you restore balance and begin to heal.

How Gofman Therapy and Consulting Can Help

If you’re struggling with stress—whether it's short-term or chronic—remember that you're not alone, and help is available. At Gofman Therapy and Consulting, we offer personalized support to help you manage stress and conquer the underlying factors that may be contributing to your stress. Don’t wait for stress to take over; reach out today to start your journey toward balance and healing.

Hands holding a yellow flower

Conclusion

Recognizing and managing both acute and chronic stress is key to maintaining your mental and physical health. By understanding how each type of stress manifests, you can take proactive steps to cope effectively and prevent it from taking over your life. Whether you’re using quick techniques for immediate relief or building long-term habits for ongoing stress management, the tools are available to help you regain control. Remember, you don’t have to navigate stress alone—help is available, and small changes can lead to significant improvements.

What kind of stress shows up most in your life? Feel free to share in the comments or pass this post along to someone who might benefit. You’ve got this!

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What is Stress? Understanding Its Impact on Your Mental and Physical Health

Introduction

Consider these scenarios: a young woman stepping into a new managerial role in her job, a college student balancing a full course load with a part-time job, and a working professional caring for an aging parent. While their situations differ, these people share a common thread – they are all experiencing stress. But what exactly is stress? How is acute stress different from chronic stress? What toll does it take on our mental and physical well-being? And crucially, how can we effectively manage it? In this post, we'll delve into these questions, exploring the nature of stress and its impact on our lives⁠.

What is Stress?

While we often think of stress as something negative, and spend so much time trying not to feel stressed, it’s important to appreciate that stress is a deeply hard-wired response in all of us that may actually be the reason why human beings are still around today. From an evolutionary psychology viewpoint, we can think of stress as a “threat-detection system” that developed in humans as a way to handle threats and stay safe. Back in the days of our hunter-gatherer ancestors, experiencing stress meant gearing up to either fight or escape a dangerous situation—like facing off with a wild animal or an enemy. This "fight-or-flight" response gave people a quick burst of energy and focus, which was crucial for making it through life-or-death situations.

Today, the threats we experience are much more often emotional than they are physical; instead of wild animals, we’re dealing with work deadlines, money problems, final exams, or relationship issues. But our bodies interpret these situations as threatening and still react the same way, increasing our heart rate, releasing adrenaline, and going on high alert. Even though these stressors don’t require physical action and aren’t life-threatening (like that wild animal our ancestors encountered) our body doesn’t know the difference and so it treats them the same way.

So now that we know where stress comes from, lets unpack the two main types of stress: acute stress and chronic stress. Acute stress is short-term, and is what you feel when you're facing a challenge right now. It usually goes away once the situation's over. Take a big exam for example. You might feel super stressed about it beforehand, but it's temporary and once the exam is over, your stress about it will go away too. In fact, you may find that some stress in these situations is beneficial! Low levels of stress has been shown to help make people sharper and more focused. Chronic stress, though, is long-term stress. It sticks around because of ongoing problems or pressures that just won't quit. Think of something like money troubles that never seem to end, or a job where you're always under the gun with tight deadlines. In these situations, there is no quick fix or big event that will end and take the stress with it. When dealing with these chronic stressors, we can find ourselves stuck in a fight-or-flight state.

Our bodies weren't built to stay in a state of stress long-term, so the same response that helped us survive in the past can actually wear us down over time. When we stay in a state of stress for a long time, it can have a major impact on our mental and physical health.

Mental Health Effects of Stress

Chronic stress isn’t just about feeling tense or overwhelmed for a little while; it can really take a toll on mental health over time. When you are in a state of chronic stress, your mind and body stay on high alert, which leads to a whole range of effects like constant anxiety, irritability, and even a sense of burnout. Over time, your brain actually gets used to being stressed, which makes it harder to relax and switch into “rest mode,” even when you have a chance to unwind. To stick with our example pf taking an exam, instead of feeling calm once the exam is over, you may notice that your mind starts looking for the next thing to worry about. Maybe you start worrying if you wrote down your answers correctly, or begin going over your answers again and again, or you may start thinking about an assignment in another class that’s coming up. This can mess with your sleep, drain your energy, and leave you feeling mentally exhausted.

On top of that, chronic stress can make it tough to manage emotions. Little annoyances start to feel like huge problems, and you might find yourself reacting more intensely than usual. For many people, this stress also leads to feeling disconnected from friends and family, or even to feeling hopeless. Left unchecked, chronic stress can also increase the risk of more serious mental health issues, like anxiety disorders and depression.

Physical Health Effects of Stress

Chronic stress doesn’t just mess with your mind—it takes a real toll on your body, too. When stress is always hanging around, your body stays in a state of high alert, which means markers like your heart rate, blood pressure, and cortisol levels are constantly up. Over time, this can lead to some serious health issues. For example, high blood pressure and a constantly racing heart can increase the risk of heart disease, while all that extra cortisol can mess with your immune system, making you more likely to get sick.

Long-term stress can also show up in ways that might seem unrelated at first, like headaches, stomach problems, or even muscle pain. That’s because stress triggers inflammation in the body, which can aggravate pain and digestive issues. On top of that, many people dealing with chronic stress have trouble sleeping, which only makes things worse. Without enough rest, the body doesn’t have a chance to recover, leading to even more physical exhaustion and health problems.

When to Seek Professional Help for Stress

When stress starts to become unmanageable, it usually shows up in ways that make everyday life more difficult. You might feel drained all the time, snap at people over small things, or find it hard to focus on tasks that used to be easy. Physical signs can pop up too, like headaches, muscle tension, pain, or stomach issues. Emotionally, it might feel like you’re on an emotional roller coaster, or you may notice yourself pulling away from friends and family.

Conclusion

Chronic stress can feel overwhelming, but recognizing its presence, and its impact, are the first steps toward taking back control. Small changes in how we handle daily pressures can make a big difference in both mental and physical health. Whether it’s setting aside time for relaxation, seeking support from friends or a therapist, or building healthier routines, managing stress is about finding what works best for you.

 

If your stress is feeling unmanageable, our experienced therapists at Gofman Therapy and Consulting are ready to help. With our expertise in treating both the mental and physical impacts of chronic stress, we will help you find balance and build the tools you need to feel like yourself again. Reach out today and take that first step toward a healthier, more resilient you.

Contact us today to schedule a free phone consultation